It's eighteen years since my husband and I begin to notice and enjoy each other's company. We found more and more things and people and places that we enjoyed, so we took out the contract and were married in Oakland on Grand Lake under the arches there. We arrived in a vintage purple limosine, some friends played our favorite song at the time -Mo Better Blues. They were joined by a person who happened to be there playing his trumpet with his case open, and rather than disturb his day, they added him into the mix. My almost grown children stood and watched -not unpleased, but not sure what this would bring to their life. We considered our getting together a miracle having survived some loss and trauma around the relationship department.
And really we went along coming together to have a good time whenever we wanted to do that, cause we were certain that was what our life together would be about. Not that we didn't have our share of life's tragedies-the loss of his parents, my parents and most heartbreaking my daughter to cancer. My husband was amazing, and I made my way day to day not knowing if I would return, much less WE would return to a happy life. Within a year or so, we had found our way back to a rhythm of enjoyment in our life and each other that seemed to create new options and joys BECAUSE we were happy with each other. When the last child fairly abruptly left the house, we were in this odd position - looking to see what was the cause of our relationship if not to have people to take care of and a schedule around those events. That journey took us to a renewal of spirit and heart, but I'll save that for another day, another blog.